CREATING YOUR OWN ROAD MAP:

Your Dream determines your goals. Your Goals map out your Actions. Your Actions create Results. And Your Results bring you Success.

Happy Celebration.

BANK ACCOUNT
Imagine there is a bank, which credits your account each morning with Rs 86,400, carries over no balance from day to day, allows you to keep no cash balance, and every evening cancels whatever part of the amount you had failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out every pence, of course!
Well, everyone has such a bank. Its name is Time.
Every morning, it credits you with 86,400 seconds. Every night it writes off, as lost, whatever of this you have failed to invest to good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the records of the day. If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours.
There is no going back. There is no drawing against the "tomorrow."
Therefore, there is never not enough time or too much time. Time management is decided by us alone and nobody else. It is never the case of us not having enough time to do things, but the case of whether we want to do it.

Been thinking about this whole ''being happy'' thing, and i feel like people get lost when they think of happiness as a destination. You might wanna ask 'how do i mean?'. Well, This is the answer: we're always thinking that someday we'll be happy, we'll get that car or that job or that person in our lives that will fix everything. But happiness is a mood, and it's a condition not a destination. It's like being tired or hungry. Its not permanent, it comes and goes, and that's okay. And i feel like if people thought of it that way, they'd find happiness a lot more often.

In a mental hospital, a mad man chases the senior doctor with a knife. The doctor runs for dear life until he gets to a dead end. The mad man stops and says, "Take the knife, it's your turn to chase me." Its your turn to chase after your success. If you like your present situation, then let the mad man keep chasing you. God bless you as you fight hard to achieve your goals in life. Happy Sunday and new week. Have a splendid week ahead.

JOKE Akpors got his WAEC result and needed to tell his father about his performance: Papa Akpors: Akpors,I learnt your WAEC result is out. Akpors: Daddy, you remember Arthur who used to emerge first in our class at the end of every term? he failed. Papa Akpors: That’s terrible, what happened? Akpors: You also remember Izzy who tutors me at home? He failed too! Papa Akpors: What’s with the poor performance? Akpors: Daddy I don’t know. That’s how it is. Even Kelvin who won the Cowbell Science and Maths competition failed. Papa Akpors: so how was your own result? Akpors : You also remember Osas our senior prefect? He failed too. Papa Akpors: (Angrily) Boy, tell me about your own result!! Akpors : (angrily) Papa, if all these people I've been telling you about failed, how do you expect me to pass? Abi I be winsh? One word for Akpors this time around?

Am so happy to say that #dheelite is one year today, i wish for many more years to come. Also Using this medium to thank all my lovely fans and viewers all round the world, without you my page and blogs will just be an empty page/blog with no message. Thanks so much for been there all these while, God bless you all.

If you were to choose (2) out of this list, who will it be? = The wealth of Bill Gates = The physique of Arnold Schwarzenegger or Cindy Crawford. = The intelligence of Albert Einstein. = The athletic ability of Michael Jordan. = The business prowess of Donald Trump. = The social grace and poise of Jackey Kennedy. = The imagination of Walt Disney. = and The heart of Mother Teresa.

Joke: An Arab Man stops a taxi, entered it and said; Please turn off the radio for in the time of the prophet, there was no radio and my religion decreed i should not listen to it especially the western music cos, they sing of their infidelity and all. The Taxi Driver turned off the radio, came down and opened the door for the man and said; In the time of the prophet, there was no car. So please come down and wait for camel. One word for the taxi Driver

Name: Usenobong David Nickname: MD, #dheelite HOBBIES: Collecting teeth from live lion, catching bullets with bare hands, Jogging up & down mount Everest MY RECORD: Fought with a tyrannosaurus rex and broke its neck, skinned a crocodile alive, held my breathe under water for 2months, 3weeks, 6hrs, 51mins, 45seconds... The list is much GREATEST ACHIEVEMENTS: Went to heaven to charge my phone. Fluent in 10,598 languages,1st man to land on the sun SILLIEST THING I'VE DONE: Ate a bowl of plastic fruit on thanksgiving day EMBARRASSING MOMENT: couldn't kill 100 bears with a single punch only 99 died instantly and the last one is now an imbecile PROUDEST MOMENTS: Firstly, When a cobra died after biting me and secondly, I roasted a dragon at my backyard with a lighter SOMETHING ABOUT ME: I really don't like to show off ....

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SHORT STORY WITH A MORAL: A dog was so faithful to his mistress that she could leave her baby with it and go out to attend other matters. She always returned to find the child soundly asleep with the dog faithfully watching over him. One day something tragic happened, the woman returned home to meet a very nasty scene; the room was a mess, the baby's cot was dismantled, his cover clothes were torn to shreds with blood stains all over the bedroom. Shocked, the woman wailed as she began looking for the baby, all of a sudden she saw the faithful dog emerging from under the bed with blood on it's face and mouth. The woman got angry and assumed the dog had devoured her baby, without much thought she picked up a big wooden pestle and beat the dog to death. But as she continued searching for the "remains" of her child, she beheld another scene under the bed, the remains of a snake torn to pieces from what had been a fierce battle between the snake and the dog which was now dead, and on the other side of the bed was her baby whom although was lying on the bare floor, was safe & completely okay. Then reality dawned on d woman who now began to understand what took place in her absence. The dog fought to protect the baby from the ravenous snake. It was too late for her now to make amends because in her impatience and anger,she had killed the faithful dog. How often have we misjudged people and torn them to shreds with harsh words and deeds before we had time to evaluate the situation? Let's be a little patient with ourselves and evaluate the situation first before jumping into conclusions and retaliating, for harsh words when spoken and actions when carried out cannot be taken back.

Name: Usenobong David Nickname: MD, Dheelite HOBBIES: Collecting teeth from live lion, catching bullets with bare hands, Jogging up & down mount Everest MY RECORD: Fought with a tyrannosaurus rex and broke its neck, skinned a crocodile alive, held my breathe under water for 2months, 3weeks, 6hrs, 51mins, 45seconds... The list is much GREATEST ACHIEVEMENTS: Went to heaven to charge my phone. Fluent in 10,598 languages,1st man to land on the sun SILLIEST THING I'VE DONE: Ate a bowl of plastic fruit on thanksgiving day EMBARRASSING MOMENT: couldn't kill 100 bears with a single punch only 99 died instantly and the last one is now an imbecile PROUDEST MOMENTS: Firstly, When a cobra died after biting me and secondly, I roasted a dragon at my backyard with a lighter SOMETHING ABOUT ME: I really don't like to show off ....

Question of the Week; guys........ Will you marry a girl for her virginity or her love? Girls........ Will you marry a guy for his love or his looks and money?

Joke: john was on his way to school. He was supposed to take taxi to the school: john: How much is the fare to the campus? DRIVER: 50dollars. John: What about my load? DRIVER: I won’t charge you that. John: Then take my load to the school I can walk.

Joke of the Day:


Two men planned to run away from the psychiatric hospital. They started planning and agreed that they will go to the gate, beat up the watchman, open the gate and run away. When they reached the gate, the watchman was not there and the gate was wide open. They turned to each other and said "shit! our plan has failed, lets go back, we will try again tomorrow....

Joke of the Day: i slept very hungry and saw bread in my dream, I took it and started eating it in my dream after I finished eating it,I saw a coconut & decided to eat it too but I didn't see a knife to cut it.So I decided to use my teeth only to receive a strong dirty slap from my elder brother! U don finish pillow....Now na my head u dey chew.... U be witch!? Abeg Na my Fault??

Happy new month viewers... Please like my Facebook page for more jokes @ #dheelite

Joke: There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet. After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, “Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?” The third fellow says “I’ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees.” The first two guys were amazed. “What happened then?” they asked. “She said, ‘get out from under the bed and fight like a man’.”

#Dheelite 1. Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor. (Truman Capote) Interpretation:Success is not as sweet if you’ve never experienced failure. 2. You make a living by what you get; you make a life by what you give. (Winston Churchill) Interpretation:The value of your life has nothing to do with how much money you earn; it is determined by what you give to others. 3. Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get. (Ray Kroc) Interpretation:Good things happen not because of “luck,” but because you work hard to get them. 4. If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundation is under them. (Henry David Thoreau) Interpretation:A dream that exists only in your mind is not useless. Use it to create the reality you want. 5. There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them. (Denis Waitley) please like my page #dheelite for more jokes and quotes.

‪# WORLDCUP‬NEWS HEADLINES 1. Enyeama ranked best goalkeeper so far in the on-going FIFA World Cup by Castrol’s player rating index 2. Cristiano Ronaldo: I never thought 'average' Portugal could win the World Cup 3. Three-match ban ends Song's World Cup 4. Thiago Silva: Fred doesn't need goals to prove his worth 5. Klinsmann: No time for friendship in Germany clash 6. Nani: Portugal grieving after draw 7. My fitness was key, reveals Hazard 8. Capello: We were caught out trying to win the game 9. Messi needs help - Di Maria 10. Berlusconi: Balotelli is not irreplaceable 11. Maradona lashes out at Argentina FA chief 12. Enyeama Tops Best Goalie Rankings! 13. Keshi: My Eagles’ll Get Better‪# WORLDCUP‬NEWS HEADLINES 1. Enyeama ranked best goalkeeper so far in the on-going FIFA World Cup by Castrol’s player rating index 2. Cristiano Ronaldo: I never thought 'average' Portugal could win the World Cup 3. Three-match ban ends Song's World Cup 4. Thiago Silva: Fred doesn't need goals to prove his worth 5. Klinsmann: No time for friendship in Germany clash 6. Nani: Portugal grieving after draw 7. My fitness was key, reveals Hazard 8. Capello: We were caught out trying to win the game 9. Messi needs help - Di Maria 10. Berlusconi: Balotelli is not irreplaceable 11. Maradona lashes out at Argentina FA chief 12. Enyeama Tops Best Goalie Rankings! 13. Keshi: My Eagles’ll Get Better

What will you if you are the president of your country?

1. Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. {Charles R. Swindoll} Interpretation: What happens to you in life is not nearly as important as your reactions to these happenings. 2. If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way. {Napoleon Hill} Interpretation: Even if you don’t achieve any impressive accomplishments in life, it is important to do your best in everything that you do, including the little things. 3. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. {Wayne Gretzky} Interpretation: If you don’t try, you will never succeed. 4. If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door. {Milton Berle} Interpretation: Don’t wait for things to come to you; take your fate into your own hands. 5. An obstacle is often a stepping stone. {William Prescott} Interpretation: Things that appear to be obstacles are often helpful in the long run.

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The 7 Dangerous Acts after meal. DON'T ACT THE 7 ACTIONS BELOW AFTER YOU HAVE A MEAL. * Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher). * Don't eat fruits immediately -When you eat your fruits with meals, the fruit is stuck in the stomach along with the contents of the meals and cannot reach the intestines in time. Lying there they get spoilt and spoil the remaining food in the stomach too. Thus it is recommended that you eat a fruit at least one hour after eating a meal or before your meal and preferably in the morning with empty stomach. It is in the morning that the body can best use the nutrients in the fruit and get enough energy to start the day. * Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.It is preferable to drink tea an hour after meals. * Don't loosen your belt -Fiction, not particularly bad for you! We generally have an attitude that a good meal is that which forces us to loosen our belts. However, loosening the belt is bad, not because it causes the intestines to twist or block but because it means that you have over eaten to a level that you are uncomfortable. Loosening of the belt may also cause you to feel comfortable once again which means you may continue overeating. So eat only to the extent that you can be comfortable without loosening your belt! * Don't bathe - Bathing after meal will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach. * Don't walk about -Fact, it is bad for you! Walking directly after meals is a bad idea, it can result to acid reflux and indigestion. However, walking about half an hour after meals is known to be good for you. Researchers in the Department of Exercise Science at the University of South Carolina, have found that walking after exercise is a good way to burn energy. The point to note is when to walk, you should ideally walk for about 10 minutes and only 20-30 minutes after meal to prevent acid reflux and stomach upsets. * Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.

READ THIS LIFE-CHANGING STORY... While a man was polishing his new car, his 6 yr old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car.In anger, the man took the child's hand and hit it many times; not realizing he was using a wrench. At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures. When the child saw his father.....with painful eyes he asked, 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?' The man was so hurt and speechless; he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times. Devastated by his own actions.......sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches; the child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'. The next day that man committed suicide. . . Anger and Love have no limits; choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely life..... Things are to be used and people are to be loved. But the problem in today's world is that, People are used and things are loved.... Let's be careful to keep this thought in mind: Things are to be used, but People are to be loved. Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits they become character;Watchyour character; it becomes your destiny. I'm glad a friend forwarded this to me as a reminder. God bless you. If you don't pass this on nothing bad will happen; if you do, you might change someones life. Pls Share It After Reading!

World cup record 2014. +Brazil maintained their unbeaten run in any openings of there world cup. + marcelo scored the first own goal against Croatia. + Brazil ended Croatia unbeaten run in the world cup by 3 - 1.

Finally, it has arrived. The moment everybody has been waiting for.. WORLD CUP 2014. Kick off time @ 9pm.. Nigerian time

WHAT WOULD YOU DO? A woman tells her husband that she is going to visit her sick mum in the village. She goes on Friday and returns on Sunday, with plenty of fruits and food stuff, saying they are from her mum to the husband and the children. The husband gently asks her about her mother's health, and how she was doing, to which she replies that she took her to the hospital in the village, and she is recovering and getting better. The wife adds that her mother insisted that she must re-visit the village in a few days, to spend at least a week with her. "I'm worried about Mama..." the wife crooned, with tears swelling in her eyes. "She'll be fine, dear." Hubby lovingly replied. The husband then politely asks her to take the items to the kitchen. As she enters, she meets her mother preparing food in the kitchen. Apparently, her mum came visiting since the Friday that she left home. You can imagine the plight of this woman; stuck, shocked, dazed and dumbfounded at the kitchen door, whether to go in and drop the items 'from mama', or return to her hubby in the living room! How would you handle this case? Be sincere oh!

Guys/girls: If your wish for becoming the opposite sex was granted, what would you love to do?

Bribery: Who should be blamed; Giver Or Receiver?

Just for fun: Write your names in japanese language please don't spoil the fun!!! Let's laugh a bit by writing your names in Japanese alphabet; A- ka B- tu C- mi D- te E- ku F- lu G- ji H- ri I- ki J- zu K- me L- tu M- rin N- to O- mo P- no Q- ke R- shi S- ari T- chi U-do V- ru W- mei X- na Y- fu Z- zi Example: David = Tekarukite Add your own funny customized name. Don't ruin the fun.

SHORT STORY: A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?” Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.” It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don’t carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down!

Football: 10 Star players dropped by their countries for the world cup Sunday Mba of Nigeria Ashley cole of England Nasri of France Kaka of Brazil Isco of Spain Quaresma of Portugal Donovan of USA Rossi of Italy Tevez of Argentina Gomez of Germany Who will you miss most ?

One of the reason why I've not been updating my blogs in the past weeks its cos........don't feel like talking bout it. I've been coming online and observing my blogs and to be frank, it was still progressing which means I was meant to do this. Well, the reason why I've not been coming online is because last month was my mum's remembrance month, i had to honor her memory. She left me when i was so young to a better place as people will say. R.I.P mum, lots of love. With that be done, am proud to say that am back again, fully upgraded, and ready to bring the world to you again. Missed you guys so much. Thanks for been there for me, thanks to those that emailed me when i wasn't around, love you all.

Football: TODAY'S SOCCER HEADLINES 1. Nigeria defender Omeruo pens Chelsea extension 2. Maradona: Higuain can win Napoli Serie A 3. Atletico: We don't need to sell 4. Turan not in talks with any English clubs, says agent 5. West Ham complete Zarate signing 6. Manchester United owner Malcolm Glazer dies at 85 7. Confident Julio Cesar not feeling World Cup pressure 8. Van Persie: Spain are still the best in the world 9. Ronaldo the world's most marketable footballer 10. I'm ready to replace Sagna at Arsenal, insists Jenkinson 11. Ozil: I want to become Germany legend at World Cup 12. Bayern boss Guardiola delighted by Pizarro renewal 13. Jordi Alba: Barcelona players shown a lack of respect 14. Chelsea make Pogba top transfer target 15. Ibrahimovic: Other clubs fear PSG's project 16. Di Maria: Anything other than winning the World Cup a failure for Argentina 17. Chelsea make Pogba top transfer target. Source from SUREBET247.COM

Football: Hala Madrid!!! Shout out to all the Real Madrid fans out there on their victory over Athletico Madrid at Lisbon, Portugal. ''I almost lost hope until Sergio Ramos gave me a reason not to lose hope with an outstanding header''. Says a Madrid fan. An equaliser from Ramos in the 93rd minutes of the game gave Real Madrid a second chance to set things right and claim the cup. A superb header from the world's most expensive player 'Gareth Bale' enlightened the fans to keep faith alive as Marcelo took charge to double the lead. Ronaldo was taken down in the penalty area and a spot kick was awarded. He made his country side proud by scoring the fourth goal of the match. To me, it was an honor for Ronaldo to score in his country home and also for Athletico Madrid not to have a chance in coming-back in the title race.

Joke:

Two young guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court on Friday before the judge.
The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday."
Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do over the weekend?"
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever."
"17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?"
"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this:
...O...o
...and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs."
"That's admirable," said the judge.
"And you, how did you do?", he asked the second boy,
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever."
"156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that?!"
"Well, I used a similar approach. (draws two circles)
...o...O
"I said (pointing to the small circle) this is your asshole before prison..

Nigeria's Boko Haram kills 28 in three village attacks

MAIDUGURI, Nigeria (Reuters) - Suspected Islamist Boko Haram gunmen rampaged through three villages in northern Nigeria, killing 28 people and burning houses to the ground in a pattern of violence that has become almost a daily occurrence, according to police and witnesses.

All three attacks happened on Thursday in remote parts of Borno state, the epicenter of Boko Haram's increasingly bloody struggle for an Islamic kingdom in religiously mixed Nigeria.

One took place right next to Chibok, by the Cameroon border, from where more than 200 school girls were abducted last month.

The most deadly was in the town of Kerenua, near the Niger border. Scores of militants opened fire on residents, killing 20 of them, and burned houses, a police source said.

Since the girls' abduction on April 14, at least 450 civilians have been killed by the group, according to a Reuters count.

A spate of bombings across north and central Nigeria has killed hundreds, including two in the capital Abuja and one in the central city of Jos on Tuesday that killed 118 people.

The source said some phone signals to the militants had been tracked to Niger itself, suggesting they may have been directed from there. Dozens had been wounded by bullets, he said.

Another attack occurred in a small village of Kubur Viu, a few kilometers away from Chibok, resident Simeon Yhana said.
The police source concurred with the attack and toll.

"They killed five people. This place is right next to Chibok. The military is supposed to be protecting this area but we fear these people (Boko Haram) are coming back," Yhana said.

Militants shot dead three other people during an attack on the village of Kimba, the police source said.

Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan was in South Africa on Saturday, his office said, to discuss ways of tackling Islamist militancy across the continent with African heads of state.

Nigeria and its neighbors say Boko Haram - which has killed thousands during its five-year-old insurgency in Africa's top oil producer - now threatens the security of the whole region.

The insurgents initially attacked mostly security forces and government officials after they launched their uprising in northeast Borno state's capital Maiduguri in 2009. When Jonathan ordered an offensive a year ago to flush them out, civilians formed vigilante groups to help out - making them targets too.
Nigeria accepted help from the United States, Britain, France and China last week and around 80 U.S. troops were arriving in Chad to start a mission to try to free the girls, who remain in captivity.

(Reporting by Lanre Ola; Writing by Tim Cocks; Editing by Stephen Powell)

Boko haram: UN imposes sanctions against Boko Haram

London, May 23 (IANS) The UN Security Council has imposed sanctions against Nigerian Islamist militant group Boko Haram, which had abducted over 200 schoolgirls April 14 and has terrorised the country.

The Boko Haram will now be added to the list of Al Qaeda Sanctions Committee's list of designated entities and subjected to an arms embargo and asset freeze, the BBC reported.
A UN official said that imposing sanctions on the militant group was necessary to support the efforts to "defeat Boko Haram and hold its murderous leadership accountable".
The sanctions would shut down important avenues of funding, travel and weapons for the group.
The announcement was made by the UN a day after twin bombings killed 122 people in the central Nigerian city of Jos.
The authorities suspect the Boko Haram of being behind them, but there has so far been no claim of responsibility from the group.
The Boko Haram, under the leadership of Abubaker Shekau, abducted more than 200 girls from school dormitories in the town of Chibok. Shekau, in a video, claimed responsibility for the kidnappings and threatened to sell the girls if his demands were not met.
Ab explosion May 18 in the northern city of Kano killed four people, including a 12-year-old girl.
More than 300 people were killed by the militants May 5 in the town of Gamboru Ngala.
A car bomb May 2 claimed at least 19 lives in Nigeria's capital Abuja.
The Boko Haram, meaning "Western education is sin", has killed thousands of people in Nigeria through a wave of bombings and assassinations since 2009, and is fighting to overthrow the government, create an Islamic state and ban Western education

World cup

Imagine the world cup WITHOUT:

1. Lewandoski -- highest goal scorer in the german league
2. Bale -- The fastest and most expensive player in the world 
3. Tevez -- Most aggressive attacking talent
4. Luca Toni -- Once opon a time goal prowess
5. Samir Nasri -- skilled midfield talent
6. Benteke -- Belgium super star 
7. Ibrahimovic -- Skillful forward with global recognistion 
8. Branislav Ivanovic -- Rock solid defensive star
9. Arda Turan -- the atletico madrid star 
10. Ashley cole -- England best left back 
11. Victor Valdes -- spain consistent goalkeeper

Add more if you know any

Have your say

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SHORT STORY with moral:

A doctor entered the hospital in hurry after being called in for an urgent surgery; He rushed in, changed his clothes & went directly to the surgery block. He found the boy’s father pacing in the hall waiting for the doctor. On seeing him, the dad yelled: “Why did you take all this time to come? Don’t you know that my son’s life is in danger? Don’t you have any sense of responsibility?”
The doctor smiled & said: “I am sorry, I was not in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after receiving the call, and now, I wish you’d calm down so that I can do my work”
“Calm down?" screamed the father, what if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??”
The doctor smiled again & replied: “I have learned to bless the name of God in every situation I find myself." Go & intercede for your son, we will do our best by God’s grace”
“Giving advises when we’re not concerned is so easy” murmured the father.
The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy, “thank goodness!, your son is saved!” and without waiting for the father’s reply he carried on his way running. “If you have any questions, ask the nurse!” he yelled while leaving.
The father then turned to a nurse to continue nagging: “Why is he so arrogant? He couldn’t wait some minutes so that I ask about my son’s state, how can a doctor be this careless and rude?
The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was at the burial when we called him for your son’s surgery. And now that he saved your son’s life, he left running to finish his son’s burial.

MORAL:
Never judge anyone prematurely, every one is fighting his or her own battle totally unknown to you; and unless you have been in an exact situation yourself, you can never know whether you would react differently. Don't judge people's choices without knowing the options they had to choose from.

What is your favourite day of the week? Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

Joke: Little Jenny walked into the kitchen one day and looked up at her mother, who was busy cooking dinner. "Mommy, how old are you?" she asked. "Now dear," said her mother, "You should never ask a woman what her age is." "Why not?" demanded Jenny. "Because it isn't polite. You'll understand better when you grow up." Jenny thought about it for a moment, then piped up, "Mommy, how much do you weigh?" "Jenny," said her mother, "That's not a question you ask people." "Why not?" demanded Jenny. "Because it's not polite to ask grown-ups about how much they weigh. You'll understand some day." "Mommy," Jenny asked, "Why did you and Daddy get divorced?" "Darling," her mother replied with a sigh, "That's something that's still very painful for Mommy, and I really can't talk about it now. I'll explain when you are a little older." The next day, Jenny told a friend at school about the conversation with her mother. The other little girl explained to her, "All you have to do is get a look at your mom's driver's license. It has all the information about any grown-up you want on it." So little Jenny sneaked a peek in her mother's purse when she got home, and looked over her license, examining it carefully. That evening, she went back into the kitchen and announced, "I know how old you are, Mommy, You are 36!" Her mother looked down at her, surprised. "And I know how much you weigh!" said Jenny. "You weigh 135 pounds." "Jenny, where did you learn this?" her mother asked. Jenny just smiled and continued, "And, I know why you and Daddy got a divorce." Her mother just gasped and asked, "Why?" Jenny replied, "Because you got an F in sex!"

Nightmarish looking deep sea fish washes up on NC shore.

Get full details on my blog @ www.dheeliteworld.blogspot.com

Suspected Boko Haram rebels attack Chinese plant in Cameroon

ABUJA (Reuters) - Suspected rebels from Nigeria's Islamist militant group Boko Haram attacked a Chinese plant in northern Cameroon near the town of Waza, a local governor told Reuters on Saturday.

Waza is 20 km (12 miles) from the Nigerian border close to the Sambisa forest, a stronghold of Boko Haram which has killed thousands in Nigeria in a five-year insurgency for an Islamist state and threatens to destabilize the wider region.

The vast Sambisa forest is close to the area where Boko Haram kidnapped more than 200 schoolgirls last month.

The governor of Far North province Augustine Fonka Awa confirmed the attack but declined to give details.
Chinese state news agency Xinhua quoted Chinese officials as saying unidentified assailants had attacked the camp of a Chinese enterprise operating in Cameroon on Friday night, injuring one person and leaving 10 unaccounted for.

Boko Haram has staged several attacks in northern Cameroon. Last month, it attacked a police post, killing two people. The rebels kidnapped a French family in February 2013.

West African leaders meet in Paris on Saturday to try to improve cooperation in their fight against Boko Haram.

Outrage over the kidnapping has prompted Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan, criticized at home for his government's slow response, to accept U.S., British and French intelligence help in the hunt for the girls.

(Reporting by Matthew Mpoke Bigg and Bate Felix; Editing by Janet Lawrence)

Growing presence in Cameroon raises fears Boko Haram cannot be contained to Nigeria

By Perry Chiaramonte

Nigerian forces believe they are zeroing in on Boko Haram, but the Islamic terror group behind a wave of murders and abductions has long tentacles that reach into the Central African nation's neighbors.
In Cameroon, which shares much of Nigeria's northeastern border, officials say militants from the group led by Abubakar Shekau have sneaked in with a tide of refugees, causing a rise in kidnappings, fighting and criminal acts just across the border from Nigeria’s Borno state.

"Right now, we are being infiltrated by Boko Haram,” Col. Didier Badjeck, spokesman for the Cameroon Ministry of Defense, told AllAfrica.com. “The military has decided to strengthen the intelligence system to effectively counter this threat, which seems to be gaining local support.”

“The boundaries between Nigeria, Chad, Cameroon, and Niger are simply lines on a piece of paper..."- John Campbell, former ambassador to Nigeria

No one knows exactly how many fighters comprise Boko Haram, which one month ago kidnapped more than 300 Christian schoolgirls who Shekau has said will be sold into slavery or as child brides. Estimates range from a few hundred to a few thousand, but experts say that does not include a much wider network of sympathizers, informants and spies placed in the Nigerian government.
University of Massachusetts-Boston Professor Darren Kew estimates that Boko Haram has 300 hard-line fighters, with another 1,000 held in Nigerian prisons and as many as 2,000 more hired guns at its disposal. But, he said, it’s important to keep in mind that Boko Haram is more of a movement than an organization.
“In addition to the hard-liners at the center, there are numerous other factions — including “moderates” and fence-sitters — and part-timers as well, many of whom may be sympathetic to the cause, or may simply be young men for hire when needed,” said Kew, who heads the school's Center for Peace, Democracy, and Development.
Founded in 2002 with the goal of advancing Islamic law, Boko Haram's name loosely translates to "Western education is sinful." It is unclear how popular the group's message is, particularly after its most recent savagery has garnered local and international condemnation. But there is no doubt that the group moves easily across Central Africa's borders, embraced by villagers either out of solidarity or fear.
“The boundaries between Nigeria, Chad, Cameroon, and Niger are simply lines on a piece of paper that were drawn there by the French and English when they were in the region,” said John Campbell, senior fellow for African Studies at the Council on Foreign Relations and former ambassador to Nigeria, told FoxNews.com. “It’s very hard to know the extent of support for Boko Haram in Nigeria itself let alone neighboring countries.”
In recent months, Boko Haram's foothold in northern Cameroon and southern Niger seems to have strengthened, as evidenced by an increase in kidnappings, said Kew.
“As of January it appeared that Boko Haram had been largely contained to [Nigeria's] Borno and Yobe states, but since February they have clearly broken out of their core areas," Kew said.
Boko Haram at one point explored an alliance with Al Qaeda, meeting with the terror group's African leaders in Mali last year, said Mark Schroeder, vice president of Africa Analysis for geopolitical intelligence firm Stratfor. But much of the secretive group's growth has been carefully managed and restricted to nations bordering Nigeria, he said.
“They [Boko Haram] have sought to recruit and raise their ranks,” Schroeder said, “but they have been careful. If they grew in size throughout the region they would likely have a coalition fight against them.”
Cameroon officials, who have long prided themselves on their nation's relative stability in the region, say violent spillover seems to come when the Nigerian forces turn up the heat on Boko Haram. On May 5, more than 30 Boko Haram fighters stormed a military post in Cameroon's Far North Region, killing a security officer and a civilian who was being held in custody. In another attack around the same time, Boko Haram fighters attacked a public market in the Nigerian border town of Gambourou, killing more than 200 and sending 3,000 Nigerian refugees pouring into Cameroon.
"Our problems come from our neighbors," Far North Region Gov. Fonka Awah Augustine told Voice of America. "Each time the Nigerian army attacks, Boko Haram becomes destabilized and they are looking for a safe ground to settle, and each time Boko Haram equally attacks either the army or a particular community, they cause the flow of the population in their thousands into our region.”

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Boko Haram leader an 'obscenity': Nobel laureate Soyinka

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Lagos (AFP) - Nigerian Nobel laureate Wole Soyinka has described Boko Haram's leader as an "obscenity" who is likely to be incapable of dialogue, as the government considers opening talks with the Islamists over the more than 200 abducted schoolgirls.

The winner of the 1986 Nobel Prize for Literature told AFP by phone from Los Angeles that Boko Haram chief Abubakar Shekau was "high on religion and drugs".
"For me, we are dealing with a sub-human species," Soyinka said. "How do you dialogue with that kind of obscenity?"

Debate over the prospects of negotiating with Boko Haram and even Shekau himself has been a controversial issue in Nigeria throughout the extremist group's uprising which has killed thousands.

The issue resurfaced on Monday after Shekau released a video suggesting the girls kidnapped from a secondary school in the northeastern town of Chibok could be released in exchange for Islamist prisoners held by the government.
"It is a bind for the nation because the girls must be secured," Soyinka said, voicing sympathy for the officials who must assess the pros and cons of talking to Shekau.

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A screengrab taken on May 12, 2014, from a video released by Nigerian Islamist extremist group Boko  …

The shocking mass abduction has drawn worldwide condemnation, partly thanks to a social media campaign supported by major world leaders and celebrities.
Nigeria's President Goodluck Jonathan has accepted military assistance from the United States, Britain, France, Israel and China to help with the rescue effort.
Some commentators have suggested that welcoming help from foreign militaries was an embarrassment for Nigeria, Africa's most populous country and top economy.
But Soyinka said such critics were showing a lack of compassion for the teenaged hostages.
"I don't know what they are talking about," he said. "This is a global crisis.

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Women carry placards in support of schoolgirls kidnapped by Boko Haram during a demonstration in Lag …

"In this situation, where we have these kind of killers, homicidal maniacs who can go into schools and kidnap hundreds of girls... all help is welcome," Soyinka said.

For the international community, given such horrifying violence, intervening is "not a favour", he added. "It is a duty."

Activists have organised daily protests in the capital Abuja demanding the girls' release and demonstrations have also been held in other cities across the country.
Civil activism is rare in Nigeria, with the prominent exception of massive demonstrations over the scrapping of a popular petrol subsidy that shut down the country in January 2012.
Nigeria has a track record of cracking down on protests and Soyinka warned Jonathan against suppressing public anger over the plight of the girls and the escalating Boko Haram violence.

Jonathan's administration "had better be very, very careful, because people are in pain and they have been in pain for a very, very long time", he cautioned.

A few protests have been disbanded by the police and there were disputed reports that Jonathan's wife, Patience, had ordered the arrest of one protest leader for falsely identifying herself as the mother of one of the hostages.

If the protests continue, Soyinka said, the government "had better get out of the way".

Will Nigeria really allow Western advisers to help tackle Boko Haram?

President Jonathan says he's fine with foreign military aid on the kidnapped girls. But Nigeria’s Army has been loath to allow close up inspection of its operations and its many problems.

For more than five years, the Islamist terror group Boko Haram has been trying to carve out an Islamic caliphate in the north of Nigeria, in an insurgency that has claimed thousands of lives. But it was not until the abduction of more than 200 schoolgirls last month that the full glare of the world turned on Nigeria.

Now, egged on by a global social media storm, Western governments are under pressure to help Africa's most populous nation find the schoolgirls and beat the insurgency. But the challenges are daunting, including working with Nigeria's military, a force that is highly valued at home but whose shortcomings have been glaringly exposed by the kidnappings.

On Monday, Boko Haram released a video, obtained by Agence France-Presse, showing around 130 of the girls, who were kidnapped from a school on April 14. The girls are filmed sitting on scrubland, wearing hijabs and repeatedly citing the first verse of Koran, followed by the words: "Allah is the only God who should be worshiped and the prophet Muhammad is the only messenger."

Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau said he would release the girls who had converted to Islam in exchange for Boko Haram prisoners.

The video is the first indication that the group may be willing to negotiate. Although the government will be reluctant to bow to terrorist demands, it may have to concede to a degree to see some girls released.

Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan is making other concessions as well, accepting some offers, at least provisionally, of foreign involvement that he initially rejected. The United States, Britain, and France have all offered assistance; the US has had a handful of advisers on the ground and is sending more. The US is also flying manned surveillance aircraft over Nigeria. Israel has pledged, at least, to send anti-terrorism experts to Nigeria. 

However, the  Mr. Jonathan’s acceptance of help from foreign powers will be strictly on Nigeria’s terms: the United States has operated a drone base in neighboring Niger since 2012; but Nigeria has long refused requests for them to operate on its territory.

IS THE ARMY GOOD ENOUGH?

Diplomatic sources maintain that any outside intervention is unlikely to involve any military action, remaining limited to an advisory and technical level.  Nigeria is notoriously prickly about military operations, maintaining an almost mafia-like code of silence, and it is immensely proud of its Army.

The crisis with Boko Haram suggests that pride may have been misplaced.
Nigeria has been a major contributor to foreign security operations, notably in Liberia and Somalia, and has long been the largest African contributor to United Nations peacekeeping operations.

Yet despite being one of the most cohesive forces on the continent, Nigeria’s military still come under fire for being poorly trained, ill equipped, and badly organized. Funds creamed off government budgets do not reach the lower ranks of the Army, a fact that limits the amount of equipment for soldiers, who are often seen wearing flip-flops at key checkpoints and communicating to their officers on mobile phones. Low morale has left foot soldiers with little incentive to fight a guerrilla movement with superior weaponry and knowledge of the rugged terrain.

A number of sources argue that Nigeria is loath to open its door and expose its military to outside observation, not wishing Western military officials to see its failings and problems up close.
How significantly foreign advisers will be held at bay or not truly utilized, or restricted from operations in Borno State where the girls were kidnapped, is unclear.
Security sources say the Nigerian forces are still overstretched – leaving them struggling to extract extremists from their lairs. The military campaign has also faced credible accusations of human rights abuses.
“Nigeria’s poor human rights record with accusations of indiscriminate killings in northern Nigeria complicates the amount of assistance we have been able to provide the armed forces,” says a British military official, speaking on the condition of anonymity.
 Mr. Jonathan’s soldiers came under intense criticism, for example, for a military counterattack after an attempted jailbreak by Boko Haram that left around 600 people dead on March 14, according to Amnesty International. It was the single deadliest day since violence erupted in 2009.

SPLIT INTO SMALLER GROUPS?

The video on Monday by Boko Haram leader Shekau fuels speculations that the girls may have been split into smaller groups to avoid detection.

Finding them in the cavernous Gwosa mountains straddling the Cameroonian border or in the vast Sambisa forest, around the same size as West Virginia, will be extremely challenging. A swap is possibly a more likely outcome and could pave the way for further negotiations.  

But for now, securing the girls safely is still a long way off.

 

Boko Haram

MAIDUGURI, Nigeria (Reuters) - Boko Haram rebels killed four Nigerian soldiers in a night ambush outside the northeastern city of Maiduguri and several insurgents also died in the firefight, according to a statement on Wednesday from Defence Headquarters.

Soldiers fired shots in the air at Maiduguri barracks on Wednesday because they were angry with their commanders about having been made to return at night to the city through an area where Boko Haram is fighting an insurgency, soldiers told Reuters.

"Troops on patrol around Chibok were ambushed by insurgents yesterday. Troops engaged the insurgents in a fierce combat and extricated themselves from the ambush killing several insurgents. Four soldiers however lost their lives during the ambush," said a statement from Defence Headquarters.

"On evacuation of the remains of the fallen troops, the General Officer Commanding addressed the troops who registered their anger about the incident by firing into the air. The situation has since been brought under control," it said.

Boko Haram has waged a five-year insurgency in northern Nigeria for an Islamic state. A month ago its fighters stormed a school in the village of Chibok and seized 276 girls who were taking exams. Some escaped but about 200 remain missing.

On Monday, Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau released a video showing some of the girls in captivity and offered to exchange them for Boko Haram prisoners held by the government.

(Reporting by Lanre Ola and Isaac Abrak; Writing by Matthew Mpoke Bigg; Editing by Andrew Roche)

Boko Haram (Bring Back Our Girls)

Meet the Nigerian lawyer who created ‪#‎BringBackOurGirls‬ campaign.

The Nigerian lawyer who started the #BringBackOurGirls viral campaign says he is humbled and overwhelmed by the unprecedented response.
“It’s gratifying that because of the popularity of the hashtag the whole world has an interest in the abduction of the girls.”

Ibrahim M Abdullahi, a managing partner at an Abuja-based law firm, sparked off the social media movement with the poignant words #BringBackOurGirls following a televised talk by Dr. Oby Ezekwesili, vice-president of the World Bank for Africa.
In fact, during her speech at a UNESCO event in the Nigerian city of Port Harcourt, Dr. Ezekwesili used the expression “Bring Back Our Daughters” when referring to the brutal kidnapping of 200 plus Nigerian girls.
Mr. Abdullahi phrased her words and unwittingly sparked off what may well be one of the biggest worldwide trending campaigns, which has garnished attention from politicians and celebrities alike.

THINGS CHILDREN LEARN FROM US. - If a child lives with Criticism, she learns to Condemn. - If a child lives with Hostility, she learns to Fight. - If a child lives with Ridicule, she learns to be Shy. - If a child lives with Shame; she learns to be Quilty. - If a child lives with Tolerance, she learns to be Patient. -If a child lives with Encouragement, she learns Confidence. - If a child lives with Praise, she learns to Appreciate. - If a child lives with Fairness, she learns Justice. - If a child lives with Security, she learns to have Faith. - If a child lives with Approval, she learns to Like Herself. - If a child lives with Acceptance and Friendship, she learns to Find Love in the World. What situation does your child fit in?

Health Tips: 4 Supplements every woman should take. Wondering if you should bother spending cash on vitamins and other pills? For most women, these four super supplements are well worth it. =CALCIUM: +Why You Need It: Everyone knows calcium builds strong bones, but this mineral is also crucial for other functions, couch as transmitting nerve signals. *Daily Dose: Women ages 19 to 50 need 1,000 milligrams per day. Figure out how much you get from food and drink, and supplement the rest. =VITAMIN D: +Why You Need It: Not only does vitamin D help the body absurd calcium, it also might play a role in preventing colon cancer, breast cancer and diabetes. *Daily Dose: 2,000 international units (IUs) of vitamin D-3 in the winter. In summer, drop down to 1,000 IUs or skip it on days you get lots of sun. =MEGA-3 FATTY ACIDS: +Why You Need It: Low levels of these healthy fats can lead to internal inflammation, one culprit behind heart disease, diabetes and cancer. *Daily Dose: 1 to 2grams (1,000 to 2,000 mg). Take fish-oil supplements with food, which absorbs the oil and staves off fishy burps. =PROBIOTICS: +Why You Need It: Probiotics, or good bacteria, have been shown to assuage gastrointestinal problems, like diarrhea, and even help reduce colds. *Daily Dose: One capsule with 10 billion colony-forming units (CFUs), preferably in the morning so it can aid your digestion throughout the day.

Samsung chairman hospitalized after heart attack

Jung-yoon Choi 

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FILE - In this Oct. 10, 2008 file photo, Samsung Electronics Co. Chairman Lee Kun-hee arrives for his trial at the Seoul Court House in Seoul, South Korea. Lee was hospitalized in stable condition at a Seoul hospital Sunday, May 11, 2014, after suffering a heart attack, the company said in a statement. (AP Photo/ Lee Jin-man, File)

 

SEOUL, South Korea (AP) — Samsung Electronics Co. Chairman Lee Kun-hee remained hospitalized in stable condition Monday after being treated for a heart attack, company officials said.

Lee, 72, was rushed to a hospital near his Seoul home late Saturday after suffering breathing problems and received CPR due to symptoms of a heart attack. He was later transferred to a Samsung-affiliated hospital in Seoul, Samsung Medical Center, where he underwent a stent placement procedure early Sunday in which tubes were inserted into his body to widen blood vessels to prevent a heart attack, according to Keich Lee, a spokeswoman at Samsung Global Communications.

The Samsung Group said in a statement Sunday that Lee "is in stable condition and making a recovery."
The Samsung spokeswoman said Monday that Lee's spontaneous breathing returned shortly after the operation and hospital officials expect good results. She said Lee remained hospitalized Monday.
Lee, the de facto chairman of Samsung Group, which is South Korea's largest conglomerate, has a history of medical problems. He has been suffering from respiratory complications since undergoing lung surgery in the late 1990s, and was hospitalized last August for treatment of pneumonia. He returned to Seoul in April after spending the winter season in the U.S. to prevent respiratory ailments.

Lee is also a high-ranking South Korean member of the International Olympic Committee.

Samsung Electronics Co. has a top-heavy command structure that centers on the founding family. Lee Kun-hee is the third son of Samsung founder Lee Byung-chull and was tapped in 1979 by his father to lead what would become South Korea's most valuable company — a global leader in smartphones, TVs, household appliances and home entertainment systems. The conglomerate also owns businesses in life insurance, hotel, construction, shipbuilding, chemical industry, fashion, credit card and other areas.

The company's business operations are run by three CEOs, though Lee Kun-hee as the head of the flagship electronics division wields significant control over the company's direction.

The Samsung Group has recently been carrying out a broad range of mergers and reorganizations in what analysts say are preparations for handing over the reins to Lee's three children — a son and two daughters.

Shares of Samsung Electronics Co. rose 1.4 percent in Seoul on Monday.

Nigeria's Boko Haram offers to swap kidnapped girls for prisoners

Matthew Mpoke Bigg 1 hour ago

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Nigerian schoolgirls could be given up in prisoner swap

By Matthew Mpoke Bigg

ABUJA (Reuters) - The leader of the Nigerian Islamist rebel group Boko Haram has said he will release more than 200 schoolgirls abducted by his fighters last month in exchange for prisoners, according to a video seen by Agence France-Presse on Monday.

Around 100 girls wearing full veils and praying are shown in an undisclosed location in the 17-minute video in which Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau speaks, according to the French news agency.

Militants fighting for an Islamist state stormed a secondary school in the northeastern village of Chibok on April 14 and seized 276 girls who were taking exams. Some managed to escape but around 200 remain missing.

The group has killed thousands since 2009 and destabilized parts of northeast Nigeria, the country with Africa's largest population and biggest economy.
The attack has provoked global expressions of outrage, and concern about the fate of the girls deepened when Shekau threatened in a video released earlier this month to sell the girls "in the market".

"I am not going anywhere" -- Former Nige … Play Video

Nigeria said on Saturday it had deployed two army divisions to the hunt for the girls while several nations including the United States, Britain, Israel and France have offered assistance or sent experts.

The Nigerian government has been sharply criticized for its response to the abductions but President Goodluck Jonathan said on Sunday that international military and intelligence assistance made him optimistic about finding the girls.

French President Francois Hollande on Sunday offered to host a summit in Paris next Saturday with Nigeria and its neighbors focused on the militant group.

The leaders of Benin, Cameroon, Chad and Niger might also attend and Britain, the European Union and the United States would probably be represented as well, Hollande's aides said.

The mass abduction of schoolgirls has touched a chord around the world, and triggered a support campaign using the Twitter hashtag #BringBackOurGirls.

(Additional reporting by John Irish in Paris; Editing by Kevin Liffey)

AN INSPIRING STORY: Two men went fishing. One was an experienced fisherman, the other wasn't. Everytime the experienced fisherman caught a big fish, he put it in his ice chest to keep it fresh. Whenever the inexperienced fisherman caught a big fish, he threw it back.The experienced fisherman watched this go on all day and finally got tired of seeing the man waste good fish. 'Why do you keep throwing back all the big fish you catch?' he asked.The inexperienced fisherman replied, 'I only have a small frying pan.' MORAL: Sometimes, like that fisherman, we throw back the big plans, big dreams, big jobs, big opportunities that God gives us. Our faith is too small.We laugh at that fisherman who didn't figure out that all he needed was a bigger frying pan,yet how ready are we to increase the size of our faith? Whether it's a problem or a possibility, God will never give you anything bigger than you can handle. That means we can confidently walk into anything God brings our way.You can do all things through Christ. I don't know if you are too busy, but IF YOU BELIEVE, TYPE, "YES I CAN".

Joke: Police stop a woman in a car ... You've been speeding ! Woman : I understand Police: Can I see the drivers license? Woman: I don't have one ... Police: Don't have one? Woman: Yeah .. I lost it 4 times due to drunk driving ... Police: Can I see the registration? Woman: No ... Police : Why? Woman: I stole the car ... Police : Stole the car?? Woman: Yeah ..and I killed the owner and chopped him into tiny pieces ... Hes in the trunk of the car in a lot of plastic bags ... Police look at the woman ..back off and calls back up ... 5 police cars comes and an officer approach the woman with a drawn gun .. Police 2 : Get out of the car !! Woman : Is there a problem? Police 2: My colleague says u stole the car and murdered the owner ... Woman : Murdered the owner?? Police2: Can u open the trunk? Woman opens trunk ..and there is nothing there ... Police2: Is this your car? Woman: Of cause here is the registration... Police 2: My colleague also says u don't have a drivers license .. Woman digs in her purse hand him the license .. Police 2 : Im confused ... My colleague says u don't got a license....u stole the car killed the owner .... Woman : Oh yeah?? Soon he'll probably tell u I drove too fast too.

The Kidnapping of girls by Boko Harm: I have been so down in emotions lately that I hardly come online due to the treacherous murder and kidnappings of girls in my country. Things are really getting out hands and I am praying and hoping that things get better soon. I was opportuned to talk to a high class socialist and was surprised to hear what he said concerning the kidnap. Would have loved to share what he said with the public but right now am not ready to let the cat out of the bag. To the Nigerians reading this, is our president doing the right thing? Is he making the right choices?

Talk of the Day: What would you do if you found out the man or woman you've been dating or about to marry is your brother or sister? Wanna hear your comments

Football: Who is your favourite "DRIBBLER" of all time ? 1. Johan Cyruff 2. Jay Jay Okocha 3. Ronaldinho 4. Ronaldo de lima 5. Cristiano Ronaldo 6. Lionel Messi 7. Diego Maradona

SHORT STORY A poor man was playing with his kids outside and his wife came up to him and kissed him and they all laughed happily; At that moment, a flashy car drove past them and in the car was a wealthy man, known for his opulence. The poor man smiled as the car passed and thought "I wish I was that rich." While back in the car, as the rich man's driver zoomed past the poor, the sight caught his attention and he sighed and thought "I wish I had that peace and such a lovely family." In the neighborhood also was an average man who lost his hands in an accident and who caught the sight of both the rich and the poor. He sighed deeply and mumbled "I wish I had hands to hug my family again and drive a car. Such is life: everyone is so busy wanting more and wishing they would get this and that, so much that we get caught up with our desires and forget to count our blessings and appreciate the things we already have. Look around, you are actually more blessed than you realize; be happy, you deserve it!

20 Awesome Celebrity Quotes Worth Sharing

1. Michael J Fox

This would be an awesome quote under any circumstances, but the fact that Fox has gone through so much and by all accounts kept a positive perspective on life and retained his own dignity at all times, makes it even more important.
If I can deal with adversity, then so can you is an additional message that I take away from this..

2. Johnny Depp

I love the quote because I think it can have two meanings (although I have no idea if that was intended).
On a personal level closing your eyes metaphorically to your own problems, such as an abusive spouse, addictions or just an all round bad attitude doesn’t mean you won’t feel the associated hurt any less.
But I also think it can be used on a more global level. That we can ignore global problems like war, poverty, corruption, discrimination, but that won’t make them go away, we actually have to make a stand if we want to feel like we are making a difference.

3. Ashton Kutcher

I didn’t really know anything about Kutcher other then he married Demi Moore and Punk’d people until I read this snippet from a speech he gave at a school.
He sky rocketed in my estimation because this is brilliant. Maybe not with this verbiage, but I could imagine the Dalai Lama saying this.

4. George Carlin

I’d never heard of Carlin until I moved to the US and now I’m sad that I hadn’t because he wasn’t just a comedian, he was a modern day philosopher.
Unfortunately, kids these days are told not to question and accept what is taught them which is why there’s an entire generation who think Christopher Columbus founded America and a group of people who believe the world is only marginally older than Betty White.

5. John Lennon

I have a sneaking suspicion that there may be an element of this that is apocryphal. Having said that, Lennon was a genius and he certainly nailed this one.
After all, isn’t being happy the ultimate goal in life?

6. Elvis Presley

I think context with this is important because Presley grew up in the time of segregation and racial intolerance, especially in the Deep South where he heralded from.
I have no idea if racism was even in his mind (I suspect not), but my guess is it caused a number of his followers to stop and think for a moment. At least I hope so.

7. Marilyn Monroe

It’s only just recently started to understand that Marilyn Monroe was nothing like I presumed. Sadly, I’d bought into the stereotype of her being a vacuous self absorbed movie star only interested in her looks and being told how wonderful she was.
I’m happy to say I was very wrong and she was a witty, caring and intelligent women trying to fill a roll that was never right for her.
I hope more women take this message on board and ignore the ridiculous attempts of the beauty industry to brain wash them into thinking looks are more important than what’s on the inside.

8. John Stewart

How could I ignore such an awesome quote when I’m openly obsessed with values and think they are the most important aspect of self development.
I almost used Roy Disney’s quote “Making decisions is easy when you know what your values are“, but I gave this the nod.

9. Lucille Ball

This almost sounds self indulgent, but it’s not.
You are the most important person in the world to you and as such you have a duty to love yourself.
Too many people (and I have to say this is more of a female thing) spend all their time putting others first. That is noble and I know it has a positive intent, but not looking after yourself is not a recipe for being a great parent, sibling, friend etc.

10. Will Smith

If you look around you every single thing you can see was at one time considered unrealistic.
If you only do things that you and the people around you think are realistic then there is a high probability that you’ll never do anything extraordinary.

11. Robin Williams

I used to know a guy who was a lighting engineer on big Hollywood movies.
I asked him who the nicest big star he ever met was and he immediately replied, Robin Williams. He said he would always eat with the technicians, even sometimes bringing them lunch and usually have them in fits of laughter.
Williams has that spark of genius/madness and whereas it hasn’t been all plane sailing for him with drug addiction etc, the world would be worse off without people like him.
So why on earth do we work so hard on teaching kids to conform and not stand out in the crowd?

12. Ricky Gervais

I saw this the other day and laughed my ass off because it’s so true.
People who are highly offended by something often believe their indignation makes them more right. Er, it doesn’t.

13. Robert Downey Jnr

It’s dead easy to have no interest in others and I can certainly be guilty of it.
Yet we all have fascinating stories to tell and it’s not just the rich and famous who we can learn from.

14. Kurt Cobain

I think we can all agree Kurt had a few problems, he was certainly a tortured soul and had an unhealthy relationship with drugs and shot guns.
However, you couldn’t accuse him of playing the media game. In other words he was authentic and not in the people pleasing business.
I try to be like this with this blog. I never want to offend people, but I also don’t want to be censoring myself all the time and end up delivering a vanilla inoffensive blog that inspires nobody.
Kurt inspired millions whether you like him or not.

15. Mathew Bomer

I had to Google who this guy was as I’d never heard of him, but I’m glad I have now.
He so nails discrimination. The moment we start to ponder whether we are being discriminatory because of a persons race, sexuality or religion is the moment we have lost the battle.
I know it’s not easy (largely down to social stereotyping) but we haven’t beaten discrimination until we don’t even think about it.

16. Ellen DeGeneres

I have never met Ellen, nor do I ever expect to, so I could be completely wrong in what I’m about to say, but everything about her oozes authenticity, caring and compassion.
I for one thinks she means every word of this and I love that we have such a powerful role model showing younger people that it’s not just about looking after yourself.

17. John Cussack

What can I say other than, YES! Whether you’re a religious person or not, surely this has to make sense?

18. Willie Nelson

Another quote touching on values.
Not sure if it’s the years of weed use that has made him so laid back, or he’s just a nice guy!

 19, Tina Fey

I could have picked any number from this very sassy and incredibly intelligent woman.
This not only makes a great point, it also made me laugh as only a couple of weeks ago I had two Jehovah’s Witnesses on my door step trying to tell me I had everything all wrong.

20. Jimi Hendrix

I have no idea if this will ever happen although I suspect not, but when he wasn’t, having wild parties, getting high and kissing the sky, Hendrix made a lot of sense

So what do you think?
I think there are some gems here from some people who we maybe wouldn’t normally associate such insights from.
So what’s your favorite, please let me know in the comments!

4 Celebrities Who Are Clearly Trolling the World

In Scandinavian folklore, a troll is a big, slow idiot beast that eats people and turns to stone in the sunlight. After some jiggering throughout history, a troll became an asshole who assholes his way through life in an asshole way, but does so knowingly. This is key. The difference between a troll and any asshole is that any asshole doesn't even get that they're an asshole. They live in asshole ignorance. Trolls do it on purpose, but they do it so well that it becomes an all-consuming brand of psychotic assholery that some people refuse to believe is real, because how could it be? How could this person be such an asshole all the time if it's not genuine, unintentional assholery? Well, there are some signs to look out for, and I will guide you through it using four of the world's most prolific trolls. Because I'm helpful like that.

#4. Nancy Grace

Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Ugh. That's how every story on Nancy Grace should begin, owing to her detestable and repugnant nature. If goodness smelled like roses, Nancy Grace would smell like a Magnum condom dredged from the bottom of a cistern in a Mumbai sewage treatment plant.
Grace has made her entire career out of loud mouthing her way through tragedy at the expense of good sense and tact. She doesn't care if she's right, or if she has all the facts, as long as she can sensationalize something terrible and get people to listen to her shrill caterwauling long enough to justify the network cutting her a paycheck. In a more perfect world, they'd simply toss her a raw steak and lock her back in the enclosure with the other shaven apes, but life isn't fair, so here we are.

Milivoje Gencic/iStock/Getty Images

"When we dated, Nancy had the worst ass beard."

In a stunning and gut-churning twist, there was a time when Nancy Grace was an actual legal professional. People's fates were partially in her hands for real, and not just as a result of her slinging blame like so much poop on her nauseating television shows. Fortunately for us, her shittier nature put a swift end to her legal career, as she had convictions overturned thanks to her withholding evidence and playing "fast and loose" with facts. So basically the shit she does on TV now is the shit she did in courtrooms when she was a lawyer -- she's a scumbag liar who prejudges people based on her ass-brained understanding of the situation.
I'll give Nancy the benefit of the doubt these days when it comes to trolling -- either what she's doing is willful trolling or she's electrodes-in-the-urethra-to-celebrate-Arbor-Day insane. But her mean-spiritedness makes me feel like this isn't mental illness, just twatishness. She's a twat.

Lisa F. Young/iStock/Getty Images

"I'll see you next Tuesday. Get it? Get it!?"

During the Elizabeth Smart case, Grace repeatedly called one suspect guilty on television when it turned out he wasn't. After the death of the Ultimate Warrior, Grace insinuated that his death was related to drugs, which it wasn't, along with the deaths of numerous other wrestlers who also hadn't been linked to drugs. This has been Grace's problem since she hatched from the pit -- she takes one potentially relevant assumption and rides it like a dying pony into the ground, regardless of whether there's any need for it. She's a reactionary, thoughtless slug of a human. If a bag of farts could wear blouses from Big Lots, it would be Nancy Grace.
Now, if we're being rational, we know that Grace actually graduated from law school, so technically she has to have at least some brains mixed in with the shit in her head, and that means she has at least a minimal understanding of the actual criminal justice system and the very basic, very easy to understand presumption of innocence. It's literally impossible for her to not be aware of it. And that means she's willingly and flagrantly ignoring it. And why? Because that gets her simian hide on the news and in social media. It's how she gets noticed. Otherwise she's just an irrelevant sack of poop with a terrible haircut. She's trolling for relevancy in a desperate attempt to maintain influence. She doesn't care about the people she pretends to be championing, and she couldn't give half a shit for justice. She wants to be seen, like the world's most foul stripper -- look at me and give me recognition and money. That's all. Fuck that filthy barnacle.

#3. Michael Bay

Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty

Is Michael Bay a legit filmmaker or a glorified monkey with a film camera and a penchant for titties and splosions? Is there necessarily a difference? Any forum on the Internet (known in some circles as the Hallowed Halls of Intellectualism) that discusses movies will endlessly debate the merits of Michael Bay's film history, and more often than not the decision will fall on the side of "shitastic." People love to hate Michael Bay movies, even though every Michael Bay movie has made more money than every other Michael Bay movie and we've all seen them.
The question now, in 2014, after a solid 20 years of Michael Bay movies, is how can you still believe he doesn't know what he's doing? Ever since Bad Boys in 1995, Bay has been criticized for his heavy reliance on explosions over dialogue and body counts of innocent bystanders in the dozens (if not hundreds) over any kind of accountability or responsibility for his central characters. He makes action movies that are built on a solid foundation of images that would flash through the head of a 15-year-old while he masturbates on a roller coaster in a thunderstorm.

Purestock/Purestock/Getty Images

"There's something in my eye!"

Every new Bay movie is met with the same derision as his previous works. Just look at the animosity already directed toward his unreleased next feature, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which Bay is only producing, not directing. Fans have reacted in a way that suggests that Bay's influence has ruined the legacy of cartoon turtles that eat pizza and fight a big alien brain while receiving spiritual guidance from an elderly rat. No one can ruin that. That's the dumbest fucking sentence I have ever typed. Michael Bay could literally film himself fucking a real turtle with a nunchuck and it would be no less artistic than the source material. But the general consensus already is that Megan Fox was a terrible casting choice and the turtle effects look shitty. Because we've all seen bipedal man-turtles, and these ones don't live up to our expectations.
I would argue, after Transformers 2, in which a robot literally had low-hanging testicles that were visible on screen and noticed by all, that there is no way that Michael Bay is accidentally making bad movies. The movies he has directed have made over $4.6 billion worldwide. No one is $4.6 billion stupid. That's in defiance of nature and goodness. Michael Bay does what he does on purpose for $4.6 billion reasons. Everyone talks about his movies. Everyone goes to see them, and everyone bitches enough to make everyone who hasn't seen them take a look to see what the big deal is, and that roller coaster keeps thundering through the wank storm.

Here's The Scoop On Jackfruit, A Ginormous Fruit To Feed The World.

by Marc Silver

Jackfruits grow on the branches and trunks of tall trees. You don't wait to harvest until they drop of their own accord — by that time, they'd be overripe.

iStockphoto

It's not every fruit that gets its own international symposium.
Then again, the jackfruit is not your typical fruit. It's got a distinctive, musky smell, and a flavor that some describe as like Juicy Fruit gum.
It is the largest tree fruit in the world, capable of reaching 100 pounds. And it grows on the branches — and the trunks — of trees that can reach 30, 40, 50 feet. (Trunk-growing is a good thing because it reduces the odds of a jackfruit bopping you on the head.)
Jackfruits are also a nutritional bonanza: high in protein, potassium and vitamin B. And, with about 95 calories in about a half a cup, they aren't quite as high-carb or caloric as staples like rice or corn.

Yet the jackfruit is "an underutilized crop" in the tropical-to-subtropical climate where it thrives, says , director of the graduate program in plant biology and conservation at Northwestern University and the Chicago Botanic Garden. In countries like India and Bangladesh, where the jackfruit was once widely cultivated, it has fallen out of favor.
So in mid-May, the , will devote two days to revving up production and marketing of the jackfruit as well as its cousin, the breadfruit.
For parts of the world facing food insecurity — the buzz phrase for the struggle to provide enough nutritious food — the jackfruit could be manna from a tree. The tree itself requires "relatively little care once it's been established," says Zerega. By contrast, popular crops like wheat, rice and corn need lots of irrigation and pesticides. And the jackfruit is a perennial so it doesn't require constant replanting.
There won't be an instant payoff for new farmers. A tree takes five to seven years to bear fruit. Eventually, a yearly yield might be in the 150- to 200-fruit range, says , a tropical fruit crop specialist at the University of Florida.
Fruits are typically picked in summer and fall. You don't wait to harvest until they drop of their own accord — by that time, they'd be overripe.
The tree belongs to the mulberry family. And it's got an impressive lineage. Around 300 B.C., the Greek philosopher wrote: "There is also another tree which is very large and ; it is used for food by the sages of India who wear no clothes."
Probably was a jackfruit. India is thought to be its place of origin.
As for the name "jackfruit," it most likely emerged from what the Portuguese called it, "jaca," which was probably a version of a name used in southern India, "chakka pazham." Jackfruit has other names, too: kathal in Bangladesh, kanun in Thailand and nangka in Malaysia.
Whatever you call it, it's a versatile food source — and thus a potential economic boon for countries that market it. Jackfruits can be dried, roasted, added to soups, used in chips, jams, juices, ice cream. The seeds can be boiled, roasted or ground into flour. Even the tree itself is valuable: high-quality, rot-resistant timber for furniture and musical instruments.
Or you can eat a jackfruit fresh.
The jackfruit is made up of hundreds or even thousands of individual flowers that are fused together. We eat the "fleshy petals" that surround the seed, which is the actual fruit, says Zerega.
The edible portion of a young fruit has a slight crunch when you bite in. As the fruit matures, it may remain firm, but in some varieties it becomes softer and more custardlike.
Curious fruit lovers can find fresh jackfruits in the U.S. Zerega has bought relative peewees (12-pounders at about $2 a pound) at Asian markets in Chicago. Crane sees fresh jackfruits at Asian and Caribbean stores in Florida, where the jackfruit is grown on a limited scale and also imported from Jamaica. Bottled, canned and other products are available online and in specialty markets around the country.
All this reporting made us eager to put the jackfruit to a taste test. We couldn't find a fresh one in D.C., so we bought jackfruit packed in sugar syrup. Since Crane mentioned that frozen jackfruit is "refreshing," we froze some and also ate some out of the jar.
As potential tasters wafted by, the first comment was, "Oh, it has an aroma."
The aroma was compared to overripe fruit, packaged fruit cup, smelly feet, stinky cheese and pet food. But really, it wasn't that bad!
As for the taste: "It tastes better than it smells," was a consistent opinion. The taste was described as "mellow mango," a little peachy, a little pearlike. The texture was compared to chunky applesauce or overripe banana. Also a little mealy and stringy.
A taster who grew up eating jackfruits said he found them too gooey as a kid, and after one bite said, "Still too gooey."
But most tasters liked it. They thought it was sweet in a good, tropical kind of way. They imagined how yummy it would be mixed with yogurt. They liked it semi-frozen (the frozen samples thawed out a bit) and were eager to a try jackfruit popsicle.
But tasters who'd had fresh jackfruits said they beat jackfruit from a jar by a long shot. When pressed, they couldn't explain why.

what do you call prayer in your native language

What do you call 'Prayer' in your native language _____?

Here iis the first look at the new satanic monument being built for oklahomas statehouse

Praise be to Satan. All photos by the author, who has a shitty camera phone
In January the Satanic Temple announced plans to erect a monument glorifying the Dark Lord on the front lawn of the Oklahoma Statehouse. An Indiegogo campaign was launched with what seemed like a somewhat lofty goal of $20,000, but by the time donations ended almost $30,000 had been raised. Now an artist trained in classical sculpture is toiling away in New York, crafting a Baphomet figure sitting beneath a pentagram and flanked by two children gazing upward in loyalty. When it is finished, it will be cast in bronze and, the Satanists hope, eventually displayed in Oklahoma.
The statue is a direct response to the state's installation of a Ten Commandments monument outside the Capitol in 2012. State Representative Mike Ritze paid for the controversial statue with his own money, and therefore it was considered a donation and OK to place on government property. Following that line of reasoning, the Satanic Temple submitted a formal application for their monument.
As Trait Thompson of the Oklahoma Capitol Preservation Commission told CNN last December, “Individuals and groups are free to apply to place a monument or statue or artwork.” The applications are then approved or rejected by the Commission. Unfortunately, the state has placed a halt on issuing permits for any other monuments until a lawsuit filed by the ACLU against Ritze’s Commandments monument is settled.

Nonetheless, the Satanists are building this thing, and I was offered an early peek at the work in progress by Temple spokesperson Lucien Greaves. Greaves told me he has received numerous threats from people who want to attack the sculpture, but that he “wouldn’t expect these outraged and nearly insensible reactionaries to actually know how to assault a bronze monument without severely hurting themselves in the process.” Still, he’s not taking any chances. The Temple is building a mold of the sculpture so they can pop these things out like evil, terribly expensive action figures whenever they need a new one.
“Depending on our insurance policy,” Greaves said, “we may be able to cast two from the destruction of one, expediting our arrival to the next battleground.”
The Temple estimates that the monument will be finished in a few months. Once it’s done, they plan to put it in front of the Oklahoma Statehouse regardless of the the Capitol Preservation Commission’s ongoing battle against the ACLU. They feel this should be allowed because their application was submitted before all the hullabaloo over Ritze’s monument.
“After all,” Greaves told me, “the Ten Commandments still stand at the State Capitol. We are fully willing to place our monument at the Capitol, even while the ACLU suit is fought, with the understanding that a judgment against the Ten Commandments will have ramifications for our monument as well, likely resulting in the removal of both.”

The Baphomet, which will stand seven feet tall and be a testament to the glory of the Angel of the Bottomless Pit, would be placed directly beside the sculpture glorifying the laws given to Moses by the Christian God. The idea of a Satanic monument sitting on government property in Oklahoma—which is like the Bible Belt's Bible Belt—seems a bit far-fetched, but Greaves says that "there has been quite a bit of discussion among legal scholars who recognize how difficult it would actually be for Oklahoma to turn us down… Constitutional law is quite clear on this issue: The state can’t discriminate against viewpoints. If they’ve opened the door for one, they’ve opened it for all.”
Ryan Kiesel from the Oklahoma ACLU seems to agree. He told the Libertarian Republic, “If, at the end of the day, the Ten Commandments monument is allowed to remain on the Capitol grounds with its overtly Christian message, then the Satanic Temple’s proposal can’t be rejected because it is of a different religious viewpoint.”

When the monument is finished, the Baphomet will rest on the block beneath the pentagram. His lap will serve as a seat for children.
One popular argument being used against the Temple’s monument is that it doesn’t have “any historical significance for the State of Oklahoma,” as State Representative Paul Wesselhoft told a local news station in January. “The only reason why the Ten Commandments qualified,” he continued, “is because at the Capitol, what we do is we make laws. We are lawmakers. Well, one of the earliest laws we have are the Ten Commandments.” This, it is important to remember, was said by a current democratically elected member of the legislature.
Greaves told me that “the idea that the Ten Commandments are foundational to US or Oklahoman law is absurd and obscene… I would argue that the message behind our monument speaks more directly to the formation of US Constitutional values than the Ten Commandments possibly could. It especially does so when it stands directly beside the Ten Commandments, as it affirms no one religion enjoys legal preference.”

Regardless of what happens at the statehouse, the Temple is charging ahead with the monument. And if it doesn’t end up in Oklahoma City and the Ten Commandments are forced to be removed, the Satanists will try to find a home for the Baphomet in another deserving state. Texas, for instance, has had a monument of the Ten Commandments sitting on its capitol grounds for 40 years. As Greaves put it, “There are no shortage of public locations across the US where religious monuments await a contrasting voice.”

If you would like to support the Temple’s monument, go to their website and buy some nice Satan swag. All proceeds will go toward the Baphomet.